It's a secret place just West of Mumbai and a little East of Memphis where all the funky cats and superstars from Bollywood hang out, vibe and jam with the legendary Soul Brothers and Sisters. They groove, they move, they swap stories and myths. But most of all, they keep it on the one... all night long.

I stumbled across it late last year whilst walking down Juhu beach. It may well have been something in the coconut water I was sipping, but as I stood with my bare feet in the lapping waters of the Arabian Sea, I saw a vision. It rose from the waters like an avatar in a purple velvet cloak with a microphone that shimmied like a supanova in the early evening sun.

A nearby beach shack was blasting out a current Bollywood hit and the music was hypnotising. Out in the distance, the vision was mesmerising. There he was... the Legend, Soul Brother Number 1, Sex Machine, Mr. Dynamite, The Hardest Working Man in Show Bid'ness, Minister of The New New Super Heavy Funk, Mr. Please Please Please, The Boss, the Star of the Show, yes the Godfather of Soul, even.

He was dancing on water, spinning, dropping to his knees conducting an orchestra of funky players with waves crashing down. "Aaaaowwwghhh!!!!!" And before I knew it, I was intoxicated with the funk. I was transfixed, I was transformed and I was transported! I closed my eyes and I was there. In a sweaty club that looked like a gangsters hide-out from a 1970's Bollywood film.

It was full of 'supafly heroes' with majestic side-burns and bell-bottom flares. Centre parted bouffants chatted with radical afros with smiles and laughter. In a dark corner sat 'supabad villains' with big collars, bigger moustaches and even bigger sunglasses. But they meant no harm, they were just digging the scene. And of course there were 'vamps' that dressed like Helen and moved like Beyonce. Nuff said.

The vibe was sweet, sweaty and soulful. Centre of it all was the house band: the tightest, funkiest, phattest, stankiest, rockin'ist, rhythm & bluesiest bunch of musicians that ever breathed. And they played Bollywood, but it was 'on the one'. RD Burman, James Brown, AR Rahman, Ray Charles, Himesh Reshamia, Prince, Shankar Ehsan Loy, Sly Stone, Laxmikant Pyarelal, Stevie Wonder... were served up into a funky masala mix of music like I never heard.

Bollywood Brothers danced with Soul Sisters. Bootys shaked, shoulders shifted and hearts pounded 'dhuk dhuk.' I stood mesmerised, baptised and funkasized in this new sound. I was alive. I was born again.

When I opened my eyes it was high tide at midnight. The moon shone bright in a starry night, the Arabian Sea was calm and there was no one around. I turned towards home, knowing that I had found a new one. As I looked up to the skies again I saw words written in the stars that said:

"Welcome to Botown"